Twisting, turning.
Emotions churning.
My heart is heavy.
My losses burning.
Oh, God,
When will you come
And save me?
My friends have left me,
And I feel abandoned.
The rejection stings.
Spare me from torture.
Please, Lord,
Let us reconcile once more.
Happy go freaky,
Style for a mile.
Ambulance mind,
So fine.
Go fetch your dream,
Get to it!
Place your hands
On the balance beam
Of life expression,
And make your moves.
Chase that vision,
That holy mission,
For you alone.
Never turn back.
No regrets.
Sail on!
Life flowing from my heart
Is cut down by rivers of doubt.
The rushing water wears down
My early oaths and affirmations,
Slowing my faith to a halt.
My simple plan to ditch the man of the gospels,
Runs into blockades along the way.
Nests of love, peace and grace
Call me away from my solitary journey.
I sometimes fight the current,
Or allow myself to rest,
But naturally I am carried away
By the fantasies and delusions
Of my silly imagination.
With a battering ram strapped to my forehead,
I push through the glistening walls of the great cathedral.
But for what?
Has this victory won me anything of value?
After all, the war has already been won by my adversary,
And this stub in the toe is no big loss to him.
My screams in the darkness win me no favors,
Gain me no pity, although he may shed a tear.
Shall I continue to throw stones through stained glass windows,
Knowing I am only hurting those I love and who love me?
Whom am I fighting, anyway, if not myself?
Reaching out.
Waves crashing,
At my feet.
Love crushing
The air
Out of my lungs.
What is to be
Expected
From my great God
Next?
Joy is pulling out
My fingernails.
Peace is knocking me
Unconscious.
What can I give
To board the train
Going up the hill?
What can I say
To bring mercy
To my body
And soul?
Grace
Is beating me
To a pulp.
Jesus,
Save me
From your church!
Save me
From society!
The powerful
And the rich
Hover above
My bleeding body,
Like vultures.
How can I escape?
Our Father, the best father imaginable, and if not imaginable, the best Mother, or Brother, or Sister, or Friend;
Who art in Heaven, that place that isn’t a place, the perfect state of being, of existing, of living; that paradise of another dimension;
Hallowed be thy name, holy, righteous, special, divine, separate, perfect, lovely, beautiful, worthy of worship by all, Daddy, Momma, Grandpa, Grandma, Uncle, Aunt, Friend, Confidante;
Thy Kingdom come, a world where God’s love and holiness is the guiding principle for all, an experience of grace that exists right now, anytime, is accessible to all, no matter where they live or what state their life is in;
Thy Will be done, a state of purpose that comes only from God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit; A goal that has already been achieved on the Cross, by paying the sacrificial debt for the sins of the world, from the beginning to the end of time; The perfect obedience and righteous existence that comes from God’s gift to humanity;
On earth, as it is in heaven, can you imagine everyone on the earth following God’s will? Can you imagine anyone obeying 100% of the time? Well, it happens sometimes, which is a miracle in itself;
Give us this day our daily bread, give us physical, emotional and spiritual sustenance , whatever is necessary to do God’s will, God provides it, and all we have to do is ask;
And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us, grace that only God can give to pardon us from our shortcomings, provided we are as charitable with those who hurt us, loving our neighbor as well as even our enemy;
And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil, God protects us from so much temptation that we could not handle. And when we need deliverance, he’s right there to save us;
For thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory, all goodness and great things belong to God. They are only possible with his grace and power;
Forever and ever, from the beginning of time to the end end of time, god with his grace, power and love exist and are provided to those who ask.
Amen, all this is true.
I want to get closer,
But I’m afraid.
I want to pray,
But I’m not sure
Who I’m praying to.
So many different images
In my mind,
Competing for my
Attention.
Who are you,
And what do you
Want from me?
Can I trust you?
I look at all
The imperfect people
In my life,
And I struggle
To understand
Words like
Perfection,
Love,
Righteousness,
Holiness,
Sanctification,
Charity,
Divinity…
The list goes
On and on.
Can you tell me:
What is true,
And
What is a lie?
I’m lost.
I closed my eyes to the world,
For I could not bear another
Moment of its peril,
Persecution and sword.
All the fighting was too much
To take in each day,
The cruelty and carnage,
The swearing and insulting,
Turning heads to wrongs abounding.
So, my hope was hanging
In a precious balance.
Whether I could go on,
Was in doubt, for sure.
I decided to appeal
To my higher power,
The merciful God of Spirit,
Who had rescued my life from ruin.
Somehow, there must be possibility
For my present earth to reconcile
All this shambles of civilization,
A carcass of the creation
That existed so many years ago.
I prayed a solemn petition,
Asking Jesus for His grace,
A gentle dose of mercy
For this time and place.
And so I placed my trust
In the heaven above,
Shedding no more tears for the future.
I know it is in God’s hands,
And I believe that is enough.
Knowing the truth is possible but being certain of the truth is not possible. Certainty is a luxury of the ignorant. There is an argument that can be made against the existence or presence or activity or feeling of about anything. Claiming certainty is possible only for those who ignore some or all of the facts. What is truth? Well, that depends on who you are, where you come from, how you were raised, etc. there is not one truth that is superior to all other truths. That’s ridiculous. The only thing certain about truth is that truth is not certain. It must be accepted by a leap of faith.
A woman stands at the entrance
With a shopping cart full
Of her cherished belongings,
Waiting patiently on the generosity,
Or, rather, pity, or worse, guilt,
Of the passerby, to convict,
To shame, or maybe, on the rare instance,
To inspire, to give a gift.
Aren’t we all like her,
Dragging our materials
From house to house,
Packing them away
For that rainy or cold day,
That is sure to come?
Aren’t we petitioners
To passing angels or demons,
Or a god that plays favorites,
To have mercy or just indulge us,
One more time,
So we can get our fix,
Spoiled children of a wealthy parent,
Taken a few wrong turns on the streets,
The pariah or prodigal reduced to
Yearning after the feed of pigs,
Coming out of Walmart with
Their baskets full?
Stumbling along the sidewalk 