Waiting for a Miracle

Drooping flower hangs over.

The rain is so heavy.

No new blooms today.

Soil is contaminated,

Roots are exposed.

Reaching up for sunlight.

Climbing to the sky.

Once the weather was nice.

Once the ground was fertile.

Now it’s just rocks and used up dirt.

No nutrients to feed the plant.

But hope remains.

The rain will bathe

The thirsty leaves.

The sun will shine.

There is a miracle coming soon.



Rasping, coughing,

Breathing deep.

Crushing, drowning,

How I weep.

Lift my spirit

With your Spirit,

Living God of the ages.

I will trust your gentle hand.

I will hope for the promised land.

You will save me,

Hold me, keep me.

You are always faithful.

Bend Your Knees!

Do you wonder how I feel?

I want to curl up in a ball.

Go to sleep and never wake up,

Except I don’t live in a vacuum.

There are family and friends,

My wife, of course,

At the top of the list.

If I left the state of things

Would be grim, full of sin,

And everything.

You look so thin!

You look so nothing,

So drab, so flat.

You look like you’re losing

All your fat!

You are mine and I am yours.

Made for each other

In heaven, by George.

We’ll go out together

Or maybe you first.

That’s the way you want it,

On earth.

I don’t know what I’d do

With myself.

Wrestle dust balls from the shelf.

There’s much to look forward to

In this life.

But I can’t remember

Any but strife.

There’s much to hope for,

Much to dream,

But all I want to do

Is scream.

We’ll make it.

Don’t you worry.

There’ll be lots of fun and flurry.

We will gather all around.

We won’t stop for any sound.

Come with me to the holy gate.

Promise I won’t be irate.

We’ll enjoy your company.

We’ll be sure to bend our knees,

Jumping off the side of the boat,

In the castle’s shallow moat.

Making Peace

Miles of smiles cramp my style.

I sing because I’m drunk, I say.

Nothing to worry about.

The same old message, coming clean.

The same old, same old everything.

Can you tell I’d rather be there?

Can you see the when and the where?

I care about her much,

All her loved ones and such.

I am just not in synch.

I’m trailing badly. That’s what I think.

If you’ve got a bit of luck,

You can help me get unstuck.

If you think that there is hope

I’ll be gliding down a slope.

I will trust the good God’s keeping.

You won’t catch me if I’m weeping.

I’ll make sure there is a gift.

It’s such a thrill. My face will lift.

We’ll provide a settlement.

Would you like a candy spearmint?

Closing In

Crawling under, torn asunder.

Beloved stolen, booming thunder.

Please excuse the mighty cry.

Nothing proven, when you died.

Angels gliding through the air.

I won’t suffer. I don’t care.

Vivid memories closing in.

Wasting away, growing thin.

What’s the difference if I go?

What’s the point of to and fro?

I just want a soothing moment.

I just want a second chance.

Only we can see the answer.

Only you can keep the balance.

Trial Size

Sloping down and then back up, like a speeding truck, I am searching for your love. Transubstantiate, lift then push, then go all out, a mystery solved, doubts soothed, memories calmed, nightmares called what they are. Do you dream at night? I do. I fly through the sky on my back, steering with my feet. Trial size.


Sometimes I feel

Like I’m going to burst.

I think of the outcome

That is the worst.

I cry inside

Because it’s not safe

In my mind’s

Emotional landscape.

Tears well up

Upon my lids.

They overflow,

The reality is.

Sometimes I break down,

To nothing special.

A mood, a thought,

I always mess up.

In the end,

I know that I

Am not alone,

So, I just sigh.


When I turn my eyes in your general

Direction, and rest my gaze on your face

Or body, just for a moment; and in that

Moment, you catch my eye with yours,

Do you wonder what’s going through my

Head, what I’m feeling, why I’m looking?

I wish I knew. But it just happens. Ouch.


I used to be concerned with

How much I did,

Or how much I didn’t do,


Evaluating whether or not

I was up to snuff

With my own priorities,


And of course,

Whether or not

I kept my wife happy.


Lately, things have

Taken a different turn.

Since my body


Has seen fit

To rebel against me,

And my doctor


Doesn’t seem able

To reign things in,

My priorities have


Changed quite a bit.

In fact, the term

“priorities” doesn’t


Seem to fit anymore,

Not for how most

People think about it.


My biggest priority

Is my medicine.

That’s not a new one,


At least on the surface,

Since I’ve had bipolar

For over 15 years,


And been taking meds

For just as long.

But now it makes


An immediate,

Drastic difference.

And the long-term risk


Without it,

Is terrifying.

It’s like food


And water.

And the third need,

Common to all of us,


But more drastic for me,

Is sleep.  More specifically,

I have to keep my sleep


In order.  I have to take

A strong round of meds

Throughout the day,


And then really

Pulverize my mind

With meds


At the end of the day,

Just so I can sleep.

And I have to start


A methodic relaxation,

Early, despite being

A night person.



I will not be getting up

For work in the a.m.



Things have changed

A little bit.


(Poetic Asides

Wednesday Poetry Prompts: 133


Digging for Truth

Deep down, I dig to the bottom.
What lies in this hidden depth?
Fear, grief, rage, confusion…
It rocks my reason, clouds my vision.

But what is the answer?
Where is the road out of this darkened wood?
Is it faith? Trust? Logic? Courage? Peace?
Is Love the answer? Where will it take me?

Right now everything is scary.
I feel caught in a cage,
In chains, buried deep underneath
Miles of ground, isolated by time,

Place, and no relationships that bring
Relief, connection, revelation, peace.
Anxiety rules the roost, it conquers all.
Fear is my father, abandonment is my mother.

Rage is my brother, grief is my sister.
This is my family. My friends are shadows,
Ghosts in a mist that only evaporate in my
Hands when I reach out to hold their hands.

I am lost in my mirrors, erroring in my program,
Nothing makes sense, nothing works.
What is the truth? Who is my savior?
From where does my salvation come?