Twisting, turning.
Emotions churning.
My heart is heavy.
My losses burning.
Oh, God,
When will you come
And save me?
My friends have left me,
And I feel abandoned.
The rejection stings.
Spare me from torture.
Please, Lord,
Let us reconcile once more.
What I’ve said in anger
Cannot be taken back.
People I’ve blamed for others’
Misfortunes
May have taken it personally.
Pressure I feel on my neck—
The bait from enemies waiting
For me to fall.
And so I wonder:
Is having my silly say
In politics or religion
Worth alienating my
Brothers and sisters?
Maybe a little temperance
Could go a long way.
Maybe if I hold my tongue
When I’m tempted to
Jump into the fray
Might win me
A different kind of victory.
One that lasts.
One that builds up,
Instead of tearing down.
One that reconciles.
One for the kingdom.
Don’t remember much about you,
From growing up.
Don’t know if we didn’t have many
Meaningful conversations,
Or if we didn’t emotionally connect,
Or if you just weren’t around.
I see you in the few pictures
We still have left.
That’s proof! I shout,
To nobody in particular.
You were there.
You came to my games,
To my concerts,
To my awards ceremonies.
But did you say anything to me?
Anything memorable?
Anything impressionable?
Anything teachable?
Why don’t I remember you?
I know you were proud of me.
I felt your support when I knew
You were there.
But what did it mean?
What was our relationship like?
Did we ever talk about things?
And why didn’t I ever go to you
For help, when I got into the many
Conflicts, arguments and problems
With family or friends?
If you were there, if you were around,
Why didn’t I take advantage of it?
Maybe you weren’t the problem.
Maybe I just didn’t know
What to say, how to ask,
How to express myself.
Maybe I didn’t quite understand
What families and friends are
All about?
I didn’t know how to safely
Navigate those potentially perilous
Waters, without asking questions
From someone more experienced,
Someone wise, someone loving,
Someone who cares.
And maybe that’s why I have
Such a hard time believing in God,
Believing he’s there for me,
Offering grace, tenderness, mercy,
Forgiveness, wisdom and guidance.
I don’t have a relationship that
Means something because
I don’t know how to connect,
How to ask for help,
How to express my thankfulness.
I don’t even sense his quiet support,
His delight in his child.
I believe that the wealthy have a responsibility to share their wealth with the less fortunate.
I believe that the government is in a unique position to manage the collection and redistribution of wealth to the less fortunate.
I believe the government has a responsibility to protect the vulnerable from the powerful.
I believe the government is in a unique position to regulate big businesses and keep them from becoming too powerful.
I believe the decision about birth control and abortion should be made between a woman and her doctor, because it is first of all a medical issue and until a baby is born it is part of a woman’s body.
I believe the government is in a unique position to protect nature and creatures, regulate big businesses use of natural resources and protect endangered species from the abuse of the greedy, powerful and wealthy.
I believe in diversity, equality and inclusion with regard to race, religion, sex, gender, nationality, ethnicity and age. I believe that these differences should be protected by the government and helped to thrive and multiply.
I believe the government has a right to tax its citizens to provide the services it provides, and that everyone should pay their fair share to make sure the government has the funds it needs to work the way it should.
I believe the government should provide medical care free of charge to everyone.
I believe the government should care for the elderly when they reach fifty years of age. The government should provide a pension and unlimited medical care to the elderly.
I believe education by schools, colleges and universities should be provided by the government for free. I believe health care and education are human rights that should be supported and protected by the government.
Life flowing from my heart
Is cut down by rivers of doubt.
The rushing water wears down
My early oaths and affirmations,
Slowing my faith to a halt.
My simple plan to ditch the man of the gospels,
Runs into blockades along the way.
Nests of love, peace and grace
Call me away from my solitary journey.
I sometimes fight the current,
Or allow myself to rest,
But naturally I am carried away
By the fantasies and delusions
Of my silly imagination.
With a battering ram strapped to my forehead,
I push through the glistening walls of the great cathedral.
But for what?
Has this victory won me anything of value?
After all, the war has already been won by my adversary,
And this stub in the toe is no big loss to him.
My screams in the darkness win me no favors,
Gain me no pity, although he may shed a tear.
Shall I continue to throw stones through stained glass windows,
Knowing I am only hurting those I love and who love me?
Whom am I fighting, anyway, if not myself?
Reaching out.
Waves crashing,
At my feet.
Love crushing
The air
Out of my lungs.
What is to be
Expected
From my great God
Next?
Joy is pulling out
My fingernails.
Peace is knocking me
Unconscious.
What can I give
To board the train
Going up the hill?
What can I say
To bring mercy
To my body
And soul?
Grace
Is beating me
To a pulp.
Jesus,
Save me
From your church!
Save me
From society!
The powerful
And the rich
Hover above
My bleeding body,
Like vultures.
How can I escape?
I believe in God the Father Almighty, but if he’s almighty, why doesn’t he stop crime, hunger, murder, rape, theft, abuse, neglect, war?
Maker of heaven and Earth, but why did God make the world? Was he lonely? Was it a mistake? If not, why the flood?
And in Jesus Christ, his son, our Lord, even though Jesus never directly proclaimed to be the Son of God,
Conceived by the Holy Spirit, but how does that happen?
Born of the Virgin Mary, ???
Suffered under Pontius Pilate, yep, sadly,
Crucified, dead and buried, again, sadly,
In three days he rose from the dead, but the witnesses weren’t recorded until long after, and by people other than the witnesses,
He ascended into heaven, ???
And sits at the right hand of God the father almighty, no witnesses for this, of course.
From there he shall come to judge the living and the dead, sooner or later, at the end of time.
I believe in the Holy Spirit, some evidence like evidence of the wind. You can’t see it, but you can see it’s effects.
The holy universal church,the church is holy, but not due to its own state, actions or deeds, but by Jesus saving grace, boasting nothing but God’s grace and mercy.
The communion of saints, this happens every Sunday, does it not?
The forgiveness of sins, we trust and hope this happens,
The resurrection of the body, simply a matter of faith, not science, which is okay.
And the life everlasting, we can only hope.
Our Father, the best father imaginable, and if not imaginable, the best Mother, or Brother, or Sister, or Friend;
Who art in Heaven, that place that isn’t a place, the perfect state of being, of existing, of living; that paradise of another dimension;
Hallowed be thy name, holy, righteous, special, divine, separate, perfect, lovely, beautiful, worthy of worship by all, Daddy, Momma, Grandpa, Grandma, Uncle, Aunt, Friend, Confidante;
Thy Kingdom come, a world where God’s love and holiness is the guiding principle for all, an experience of grace that exists right now, anytime, is accessible to all, no matter where they live or what state their life is in;
Thy Will be done, a state of purpose that comes only from God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit; A goal that has already been achieved on the Cross, by paying the sacrificial debt for the sins of the world, from the beginning to the end of time; The perfect obedience and righteous existence that comes from God’s gift to humanity;
On earth, as it is in heaven, can you imagine everyone on the earth following God’s will? Can you imagine anyone obeying 100% of the time? Well, it happens sometimes, which is a miracle in itself;
Give us this day our daily bread, give us physical, emotional and spiritual sustenance , whatever is necessary to do God’s will, God provides it, and all we have to do is ask;
And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us, grace that only God can give to pardon us from our shortcomings, provided we are as charitable with those who hurt us, loving our neighbor as well as even our enemy;
And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil, God protects us from so much temptation that we could not handle. And when we need deliverance, he’s right there to save us;
For thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory, all goodness and great things belong to God. They are only possible with his grace and power;
Forever and ever, from the beginning of time to the end end of time, god with his grace, power and love exist and are provided to those who ask.
Amen, all this is true.
I want to get closer,
But I’m afraid.
I want to pray,
But I’m not sure
Who I’m praying to.
So many different images
In my mind,
Competing for my
Attention.
Who are you,
And what do you
Want from me?
Can I trust you?
I look at all
The imperfect people
In my life,
And I struggle
To understand
Words like
Perfection,
Love,
Righteousness,
Holiness,
Sanctification,
Charity,
Divinity…
The list goes
On and on.
Can you tell me:
What is true,
And
What is a lie?
I’m lost.
Stumbling along the sidewalk 