When I turn my eyes in your general
Direction, and rest my gaze on your face
Or body, just for a moment; and in that
Moment, you catch my eye with yours,
Do you wonder what’s going through my
Head, what I’m feeling, why I’m looking?
I wish I knew. But it just happens. Ouch.
Touching, so gentle it scares me. Hands
Entwined, lips kissing. Quietude
Surrounds us. Inside, our souls purr like
A kitten. Laughing–giggling, even. You
Disarm me with your loving manner.
I was at a party
And three of my ex-girlfriends
I knew I was in trouble then.
But you weren’t there yet
And one kissed me on the lips
And covered my face
With all her lipstick.
I panicked then,
And asked my friends
To run interference,
As the other two arrived.
Just then, I saw you,
And I couldn’t wait
To run to you
And tell you
Just how beautiful
You are to me,
How all my dreams came true
When me became we
And how I’ll never want
When I hear your voice
It’s like the clouds
And sunshine’s bathing on me.
And when I feel you close
I want to touch
I want to feel
I want to know
You feel the same
I am yours
Like I said at the beginning.
And I’ll never want
We find our rhythm
In much the same routine.
We meet different people
That color our lives
With dignity and love,
And leave a lasting impression.
These instances are rare.
We go round in circles,
Making our indentation
In life, the world and time.
Like a beautiful sea shell
We become a treasure
Through our experiences,
And our gifts.
Deep down, I dig to the bottom.
What lies in this hidden depth?
Fear, grief, rage, confusion…
It rocks my reason, clouds my vision.
But what is the answer?
Where is the road out of this darkened wood?
Is it faith? Trust? Logic? Courage? Peace?
Is Love the answer? Where will it take me?
Right now everything is scary.
I feel caught in a cage,
In chains, buried deep underneath
Miles of ground, isolated by time,
Place, and no relationships that bring
Relief, connection, revelation, peace.
Anxiety rules the roost, it conquers all.
Fear is my father, abandonment is my mother.
Rage is my brother, grief is my sister.
This is my family. My friends are shadows,
Ghosts in a mist that only evaporate in my
Hands when I reach out to hold their hands.
I am lost in my mirrors, erroring in my program,
Nothing makes sense, nothing works.
What is the truth? Who is my savior?
From where does my salvation come?