If Only


Happy hello,
A gentle nudge.
Grasping for love
In the wispy air.

Echoes of loneliness
Throb through my body.
To be alone again
Terrifies my heart.

What if I make a mistake?
Something impulsive, perhaps?
Something desperate.
What if I cry out,

For something real,
Something true?
If only I could feel
Like I wasn’t alone.

I would like to bury
These insecure feelings,
But they dig their way out
Every time.

Can you meet me
Somewhere, discretely?
No, that would be wrong.
Let’s just be happy

With what we have.
Let’s just continue
To be lonely.
It is the right thing to do,

Though I ache down deep
For something to fill
These chasms in my soul.
If only…


Author: Gordon S. Bowman III

Writer, Visual Artist, Blogger, Advocate

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