Come oh come

Saintly garb is too legit.

Black carpet

Round the pit.

Comfortably numb,

That’s what I hit.

Come forth, Lazarus!

Hurry, come quick!

See the angels

In the sky.

See the banner

In my Budweiser eye.

Come oh come,

Ye saintly types.

Come home, come home.

Now, let’s not fight.

Toys

Looking up and down

I see what you’re trying to do to me,

This fine winter day,

This day of all days.

This day to give gifts

Is a special day.

This day to eat cookies

And pray, Hey, hey!

Christ comes

On a rocking horse,

Every December

Twenty-fifth!

Don’t ya know?

A Poem

Writing a poem is as easy

As saying please for help

When you’re broken down

With a flat tire

Or your radiator has overheated.

Boy, I could sure use some help right now.

Well, friend, what do you need?

A bottle of water would be just fine, Jim.

Okay, brother, don’t mind if I do.

Let’s work on this together.

To my wife, I say, I love you.

So what’s the trick, Bill?

Just say what you mean,

Or if you’re more daring,

Say what you don’t mean.

Easy as pie!

One Last Stand

Riding fast, I heard the blast

Of a shotgun behind me.

Pull over! They shouted,

But I wouldn’t give in.

I raced the sheriff

To the border, and that’s

Where I made my stand.

I got out some sugar,

Some lemonade mix,

And a jug of water.

I mixed it all together,

One last time.

Thirsty? I asked,

With a broad grin.

Not this time, Cisco.

But I’ll be watching you.