Oh, great and powerful
Bottle of bleach,
What reverence you instill
In the youngest of clothes washers!
Your sanctifying power
To clean the most soiled of garments,
Is unsurpassed by all other
Your glorious odor
Penetrates the strongest of nostrils.
The smelliest of stains.
One drip of you in sink water
Can wash the nastiest of dishes.
Oh how I dread the thought
Of being a speck of dirt in your path!
I am loyal to you to the death.
I will never dream
Of doing laundry without you.
You are my salvation!
Thank you, bottle of bleach,
For your dedication to your task.
Your conviction and perseverance
Will follow me all the days of my life.